Adversity: How Quickly Do You Bounce Back?

Are you a high-expectations leader, who gets frustrated by people around you turning up but not switching on?

What doesn't kill you will only make you stronger! At some time, when you were feeling disappointed, hurt, frustrated or downright rejected, you've probably had someone attempt to cheer you up with this platitude. However, do tough times really make you stronger?

Yes, tough times can make you stronger. It simply depends upon how you manage your thinking.

You won't get stronger if you choose the victim path and blame others/something else for your circumstances (the weather, the government, the other person). Choosing the victim path weakens you.

Adversity can make you stronger when you make a choice to grow from it.

Want to know the extent of your personal growth?

A sure sign is how quickly you bounce back from adversity. A person with limited personal growth can allow a flat battery in their car, to ruin their entire day. When you invest the effort to grow and develop your emotional, spiritual, and mental fitness, you bounce back in a quicker space of time - no matter the challenge.

The success formula is a great tool to use to get you back on track.

An Example of a Person's Personal Growth, Helping Them to Bounce Back Quickly

Recently a client had a crucial project unravel (one, he'd been working on for several months). If he had been successful in bringing it together, it would have brought in additional revenues of many millions of dollars to his organization. Unfortunately, an unexpected event caused the entire project to fall to pieces.

He reflected upon how a couple of years ago this 'disaster' would have set him upon a path of self-destruction: binge-drinking, drugs, and over-eating. However, because of the personal transformation he has undergone, in the past year or two, he had a day or so of feeling upset and bewildered but kept reminding himself, that this will pass. His mantra was, "Hold my centered-space and learn from this so I empower myself even more."

Instead of immersing himself in alcohol, drugs, and food (for possibly many months if history was any indicator) to avoid and hide from the pain of disappointment, he focused on what he could do differently next time.

Within the space of a week, he had developed many new strategies and even found a way of resurrecting the project so that it could still hit some of the original goals. This very power-filled client has indeed become stronger because now he choses the path of strength, courage, and wisdom.

Yes, adversity can make you stronger, when you listen to your heart, stay in your power center and make a choice to grow from it.

Over the next couple of weeks monitor how quickly you bounce back - from both the small stuff and the big stuff.

For example, do you let someone who is rude to you blow your whole day or do you brush it aside and stay within your power center? If you discover that small events have a substantial negative impact on your day, then maybe it is time for you to up your personal growth.

Quick Tips When You are Dealing with Adversity or Failure

Acknowledge that it didn't work - don't try to defend or justify
Acknowledge that you survived - over time you will learn that you can survive anything
Clean up any messes you have created and deliver any incomplete work
Acknowledge if you have messed up somebody's time and/or didn't deliver what you promised - heal your network of support particularly if you are angry with someone
Review your Success Box and get your mind in a positive framework. (If you aren't already you should keep a file filled with mementos of victories, thank you notes and 'atta girl/boy' memories.)
Learn the lesson. Keep a lessons book. However, keep it focused on what works. You don't want to focus on what doesn't work. You don't want to focus on the problem. You want to acknowledge the problem, and then give your undivided attention to where you want to go.
Find a mentor,
Read books and listen to audios that inspire and provide you with a new skill or mindset
Use the ABCDE Model.
Absorb your learning, re-set your goal and go again

Keep in mind, as you are dealing with failure: You have to be willing to make mistakes in order to be hugely successful. Thomas Edison had 10,000 mistakes before he invented the light bulb!